Whatever
we do in life, particularly if it is in the public domain, it will have either
praise or criticism or just no comment type of reaction. Actually, both genuine
criticism and praise are good for our healthy growth. Interestingly, wise
people do not take these reactions either too seriously or too casually. In
fact, they are in the habit of assessing their work objectively and find out
the shortcoming, if any, to accept and rectify or in general have the attitude
to keep on introspecting and improving their quality of work. But what majority
of people are found to do? Their normal tendency is to accuse or
criticize other people. Laurence C. Smith Jr. says that the frequency
and universality of criticism in our society have a much greater overall effect
on humans than the isolated incidents of other types of abuse. That is why
criticism is termed as the most universal negative force in our society.
It
is also a fact that we praise someone for true reasons rarely, whereas it is
our duty socially and professionally to praise a person for his true
achievements loudly and that too in public. It has several positive impacts on
the person concerned and the society at large. Ironically, we do praise some
people even without any positive reason and the praise is so blatantly showered
on that undeserved person that the word loses its meaning completely and turns
into a brazen flattery. Historically, however, flattery has been a standard
form of discourse, meaning conversation, when addressing a king or queen or
power that be. The journey of world history does testify that it used to be a
common practice among writers and poets to flatter the reigning authority. But
surprisingly, this age-old practice has come to such a pass that currently the
ruling political party or coalition world over have followers who blindly
support all moves of their respective party, both good and bad alike. On the
other hand, the followers of opposition parties criticise and accuse the party
in power for all things, good as well as bad. Unfortunately, this has been the
way of political life which in its own way polluted other walks of life in our
society. Can this practice be termed as healthy for any democratic
political system?
Let us take another situation. You might have also seen or yourself too have experienced the kind of flattery which might have made you feel like a king which you are really not. But the flatterers always follow their own agenda to keep you in a dream world. The pertinent point here is to remain in your senses in those trying moments, not to accuse or criticise the world afterwards. In fact, it was not the fault of their praise, flattery or criticism. In fact, you were not in your senses at that moment. Isn’t it?
It
is true that when we are praised, we feel happy at that moment as praise is the
sweetest sound. But, as Martin Yan of 'You Can Cook' fame
says, "Happiness is within you. It has nothing to do with how much
applause you get or how many people praise you. Happiness comes when you
believe that you have done something truly meaningful." Conversely, many
times you are criticised so badly and at times, so convincingly that you feel
really dejected and depressed. In such a situation it is advisable to follow
what John Wooden, the American basketball player, coach and writer of
well-known book, ‘Pyramid of Success’ suggests, "You can't let praise or
criticism get to you. It's a weakness to get caught up in either one." The
renowned composer Mozart says it in a different way, "I pay no attention
whatsoever to anybody's praise or blame. I simply follow my own
feelings." To say, when you are performing well, people may praise
you. On the contrary, people criticize and criticize you more when you fail to
perform. So, it is always better to believe in yourself; continue to do your
best and never feel let down or overjoyed by what the onlookers say.
Yes,
the process of introspection is very important in our life which enables us to
look inward to understand rightly about our strength, weakness, emotion,
thoughts, values, character etc. that actually drive us to act effectively
towards our growth journey and improvement in life. In nutshell, whether it is
fame, praise, accusation or criticism, it is better to take it easy and thank
all concerned for offering you an opportunity to introspect objectively and
improve consistently to reap the real benefits.
As always, I'm keen to know what you think on this subject. Hence, I request you to post your comments to share your valuable opinion. (hellomilansinha@gmail.com)
# Published in my Sunday Column of "Morning India" daily.
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